Unknown

Hello my name is Ronan and I’m 17 years old. I’m not sure who I am, what I want to be in regards to what I want my sexuality to be. I’d go back and forth not sure if I’m doing the right thing and honestly sometimes I feel that being gay makes me feel wrong and that some people try to correct me. I don’t have any good relation with my parents so coming out wouldn’t be a problem it’s just being identified erroneous by people you know. When I’m out with someone uncanny or benevolent I’d think I’d be okay no matter what anybody says because this person really matters to me, yet I can’t be that way; I’m a coward and I feel nowhere near comfortable. Not a day goes by where I don’t think about my sexuality. Some people speculate and it hurts to not have them see love at the same level. After watching the real L word, don’t get me wrong because it is a spectacular show, however I’m even more baffled and befogged to whether I’d be able to grow in that kind of lifestyle. Lifestyle where you have to deal with reality and a spectrum of society and ordeal perspectives. I don’t blame society for being this way because it is a big change in tolerance and acceptance and I don’t want to be in recluse for the rest of my life so leading this lifestyle later on in life has been a worrisome thought.

I have an affinity for scintillating, effervsce beings and all my life I have been in search for this one person. To grasp someone who feels the same and feeling worth, like any other being who loves someone man or woman. Although I still do struggle with who I am today, I still search this forgiveness within myself and tolerance. I may not know what I’m going to go up against but hopefully I will learn to be at ease with myself not sure how but I think I can get there.