Just A Girl With Two Lives!
by Emma
(Cape Town, South Africa)
Hi there…first of all must say im the greatest fan of the show, both the l word and the real l word. It has become like my secret happy time series, whenever i watch it i feel complete and just myself. Puts my imagination into motion since i cant live this kinda life in real time. South Africa is open minded to a lot of things but there is still that bit of doubt and discomfort and i guess a real lack of understanding of these things or even wanting to understand them! Only the brave get to live out their lives and feel happy, majority are still hiding in the closets filled with misery! Im no exception, the only time im honest even with myself is wen im locked away in ma room watchin the show with my imaginery girlfriend…it provides the breath that carries me through the other hours of my other life!
I first realised i liked girls wen i was 12, she was my teacher…everytime i looked at her i couldnt breath for a few seconds and my heart would race so fast i thought id die!Excruiting feeling! I brushed that off as expected, got to high school and another took my breath, then another and another. My final year at high school i dated this guy and well the void wasnt filled! Im in college now, single and definately know where i stand with my sexuality-i love me girls! Do forgive ne stamie bt ur girl, my my my u better keep her very close, very close! On the surface like many girls, im too straight for words, no one even suspects i might be a lil bit out of the ordinary. Basically i have this secret life with the l word crew then this other with real time. Kindaff a sad story and even more sad seeing that i have no plans of actually identifying myself as anything more than your “regular” girl living her “regular” life. Its a risky transformation in this area, not so comfortable!
Men for me though are a no zone so that leaves me with two options, secretly date women n not get caught or stay single till i die all miserible! i just discovered the show and wow has it made a difference!! Stamie, Tracy is like my gf too in ma other world LOL! Keep it Up!!
r infolink_pid = 17782;
var infolink_wsid = 2;
OMG ! I live just the same thing as you do, even for the boyfriend part during your final year ! The reason for my not coming out is kind of different though: my dad knows how I feel, but I don't feel like telling it to my mum, she's far too narrow-minded to accept that… I'm starting college in September and I'm expectingit would be a good opportunity for starting a "new" life and let people know who I really am !
Wish you the best,
From Paris, Celine.