Do I want too Much?
Hello My name is Melissa from Tucson, AZ. I am 24 years old. I have been in a very loving and committed relationship with my girlfriend for 6 years and counting. Most people say that I am too young to be so settled. But not me, I know what I want and I get it! Lately I have been thinking about my future and where I want to be in the next couple of years. I want kids. I have always wanted kids. I am a natural born mother. It’s in my soul. I want to get married, even if it is not legal in my state yet. This is where her and I differ. She thinks that all that will come eventually. I say, whats the wait? I think after 6 years I have shown that I am committed to her and everything that we have. We will make great parents. Am I just being selfish? I have always told her that I will be with her through anything but I dont want to sacrfice my dreams of having a family but I dont want to be without her. I am very happy, I just feel a little incomplete.
I am in the same predicament. My wife want's me to be pregnant NOW, and I want to wait one more year. I want us to buy a house before we bring a baby into our family.
What you need to ask yourself is 'Are you TRULY ready?'. You may feel ready in your heart and when you see a baby you melt, you catch yourself looking at baby clothes:) I do it! But only you know if you are fully ready in every sence. You both need to be open to your feelings towards a family. If one of you isn't quite ready then maybe it's time to wait.
Us Lesbians have that great opportunity to choose WHEN we have a baby. Most women get 'knocked up' and are in a stuck situation. It's a lot more work then we realize:) I don't think you are selfish nor do I think you have to sacrifice your dreams. I think that if you truly love eachother you will compromise and do what's best for the BOTH of you. 6 years is a long time, my wife and I have been together 6 years. Maybe try a puppy or something to fill that empty void that we women get when it comes to babies. Try hanging out more with friends who have them, it helps take the nagging need away:)
Communication and compromise are the keys to making this situation work. I am just trying to offer some words of advice, and I hope it helps:) Good luck to you and your girlfriend!